How to Navigate a Barbecue as a Wellness Revolutionist Without Losing Your GD Mind
Those dog days of barbecues and raging heat. (The very heat that makes you question all of your choices in car exterior and interior. Or is that just me? Black interior and black exterior + Louisiana = not a wise decision).
I've put together a handy guide for you, which I hope you will take into the upcoming summer season of bikinis, grilled foods, cheesecakes, Jello fruit salads, slip n slides, and beer with joy and ease:
"How to Navigate a Barbecue as a Wellness Revolutionist Without Losing Your GD Mind"
1. Bring your PLAYfullness.
First and foremost, remember that summer is about FUN. All of our conditioning up to this point led us to work really hard from August/September through May/June. However, once that final school bell rings and the school zones are no longer in effect, IT'S REAL HARD TO BE AN ADULT. May/June - August/September is a season where the heart years for PLAY. Long vacations. Early days out of the office. Wistfully staring out the window as you bundle yourself in a sweater because of the over-air conditioning.
So be sure to bring your childlike sense of joy, curiosity, and wild abandon to your next barbecue.
2. Practice WILD ABANDON.
Yup. Diet culture and diets have led us to believe that we must be perfect ALL the time. Count calories. Weigh in. Macros. Micros. Nutrient dense. Diet culture has also taught us about cheat days. And you do what diet culture advises because it works short term and you're a smart bird and you've seen the success you have when you diet. This leads you to be fearful of certain foods and distrustful of your own body, and then you spend the entire party either uncomfortable and thinking about the food but not partaking OR over indulging because you don't know WHEN you'll allow yourself to have said delights again.
Girl, you can have any of that food ANY time you want. This is the time to engage the mantra of food sanity:
I can have as much as I want of whatever I want as long as I'm fully present.
3. Tune into INTERNAL cues.
Okay, so say you want to practice the mantra of food sanity. How do you stay fully present at a barbecue when you're talking with your friends and engaging guideline #1, Bring Your Playfulness?
Here are two scenarios:
Laney loads up her plate with every single thing at the buffet. Not a ton of each thing. A sample of each thing so she can gauge which ones actually delight her palate. She doesn't know exactly what her body is craving, so she tries each item, noticing how each tastes. Noticing if she actually enjoys it. She only eats half of her fruit salad and ALL of her burger; not because she was measuring or trying. Simply because that's what she wanted. Some of the sausages remain on her plate, and she feels super satisfied. Someone calls her over for a picture, and she puts her plate down. It's quickly forgotten. Her palate sated and her belly satiated, she doesn't even think about food again until the cheesecake comes out. And then, of course, she has to have a piece!!
Petra heads over to the buffet and takes stock of everything on the table. She sees the tray of sausages and thinks, "hm... should I have sausage today? It might make me bloated... is that keto? Wait, no. Vegetarian... and should I put cheese on my crackers? Food combining... do I put cheese with crackers? I need a protein with a carb, right? Maybe I should have crackers only, and I'll just stick with the veggie plate and the fruit salad. I don't need a burger. She puts small bits of food on her plate and eats only the things she thinks she should. Soon she's hungry again, so she goes back for more veggies and fruit. When the cheesecake comes out, she feels too stressed out to have any. Then, when Petra gets home, she finds a bag of chips and eats a ton, feeling like, once again, she can't get this right.
One question could have really helped Petra: What do you want?
The thing about mindful eating and all this listening to internal cues is... it takes practice, and it can DRIVE YOU BONKERS if you let it. As a chronic over-analyzer, I understand. I used to over-analyze the heck out of ALL of this.
So really there's just one question to answer:
What do you want? (Not what you think you SHOULD want. But truly... what do you want? Get curious. Try lots of things. Abandon rules, shoulds, and self judgement.)
4. Try a fun new recipe!
I used to get major anxiety when I went to social gatherings. I was worried there wouldn't be food for me, and I'd go hungry. If this is how you feel, I get it.
One way to ensure there's something for you is to bring YOUR favorite thing. Something you know you can eat, and something that will delight others, too. Food is connection, and there's just sumtin' special about sharing good food with good people.
Here are a few good BBQ recipes for a variety of sensitive stomachs:
And this weekend I'll be sending out a berry cheesecake crumble for your delight (if you want it, join my community!) I just tried it and... daaaaaaaang girl. It's real good.
So what's the biggest concern you have about hitting up a barbecue?
P.S. This is exactly what we'll be digging into at the upcoming Fed Up half day retreat. Check out the full details here. June 30th from 1:30 - 6:30 pm (dinner is included!)
P.P.S: Ready to love the food you eat and live the life you love? Here are a couple ways I can help you with ending the cycle of shame and regret when it comes to food and your body:
1. Join the Glowing Goddess Guru Beast Mode group and connect with women who are investing in their health and happiness, too.
This is my new Facebook community where women learn to get more of what they want in their body, food, and lives. Click Here
2. Get yourself a copy of Glowing Goddess Guru Beast Manifesto.
If this is the kind of food & life philosophy that you find intriguing, or if you're interested in this kind of approach to eating and living well, you'll really dig the book I'm wrapping up and getting ready for print right this very moment: Glowing Goddess Guru Beast Manifesto. It's now available for pre-sale!
3. Come to my free virtual workshop on Monday, July 9th, Fed Up: ditch food confusion, emotional eating, & control re: dieting and your body.
This class introduces you to the framework I designed to help women move the needle from food obsessed to obsessed with living well. One of the greatest myths we've come to believe as women is that dieting is the solution to our body woes. Nah, girl. It's time to bust that myth and smash the foodtriarchy. Reserve your spot here (it's legit limited to 100 people so I'm not just saying you should reserve your spot. I hate that slimy sales speak!)